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Tessa Dongelmans | Freedom Coaching | Berlin | contact@tessadongelmans.com | Impressum | 

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5 Tips - How to Become Who You Want to Be

December 2, 2017

 

 

Remember the magic wand in the previous article? The one that can turn you into the person you want to be. Let’s take a closer look at what we can do in our lives, to make this magic happen.

 

So in the latest post I wrote about the freedom we have to choose which parts of our personality we would like to develop. Moreover, the freedom we have to change certain personality traits to stimulate our personal growth.

 

An important notion with regard to this mindset, is that we choose to develop or change ourselves not from a place of dislike. This means that I’m not developing myself because I don’t like who I am, or I don’t accept or love who I am. Rather, I am developing myself from a place of aspiration, curiosity and the urge to learn.

 

Here are 5 practical life coach tips, that will help you to do so:

  1. Write your own story down. Take time to consider which elements in this story are helping your personal growth and which are not helping. What would you like to change about your story? 
     

  2. Research the personality traits you would like to implement in your life. Read books, watch documentaries, follow online lectures, anything that can plant a seed in your system. Or in other words, anything that will start a neuronal connection in your brain, allowing new behavior to arise. 
     

  3. Choose a regular moment during the day in which you evaluate how it is going. For example: I want to be more calm - “How do I feel right now, how did I respond in that conversation, if I keep going like this will I still be calm later today?” Try to avoid comments like “I’m doing bad, why did I (not) do that, etc.”, any comment that holds a judgement towards your own behavior. Rather try to stay curious and playful: “Oh, that’s interesting, let’s see if I can relax a bit more the next time”. 
     

  4. Practice all-round mindfulness. This will help you with tip number 3, and it will help you to stay aware of your thoughts and emotions, even during the heat of the moment. 
     

  5. Practice self-love and self-appreciation. This will help you to stay compassionate towards yourself during the process of change (which is really a process of trial and error).

 

Feel free to adjust these tips to your own life.
Make it your own, give it a try and most importantly: Enjoy!

 

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